Did You Hear!?
Denver – Good evening, everybody! I hope your week has been going well so far. Tonight’s article is a quick one – it may or may not be my birthday today. Someone left a comment at my blog early this morning that obviously and opulently announced to the whole freakin’ world that it may or may not be my birthday! I am outraged! I am appalled! I am voluptuously and verily veracious a vegetarian!
HaHa!
I’m just messin’ with all ya’all!
Anyway, as I said before, it may or may not be my birthday today. In fact, I am going out to eat with the girls because we are hungry. We are simply going to a nice restaurant that costs a little more than Taco Bell because the girls insist.
Like, I have a choice, all ya’ll.
In fact, I do not believe in birthdays! That’s right. Birthdays are for the Chinese – they are the world’s best managers of birth dates!
I am not kidding you!
If it were my birthday, and it may or may not be, but if it were my birthday .. I might have a drink in a restaurant. I mean, I don’t normally drink, but tonight is a different night.
It’s the anniversary of the Squirrel that Run Up the Tree! It happened last week – exactly seven days ago! The girls think it is, “so cute!” that the rabies-carrying-flea-infested mammalian-monster taunts the animals by making stupid faces before running up the Tree.
I still don’t understand why they yell at me when I tell the dog, “Go get the Squirrel! GET IT! TEAR IT UP! ATTAGIRL! DO IT. DAMN DOG!”
Gawrsh!
But, if I happened to get rid of the pesky pester of a pest – the Squirrel that Run Up the Tree – then we would absolutely have a reason to celebrate! In fact, I could even whip out the ol’ BBQ grill and cook the Squirrel that Run Up the Tree exactly like Survivorman does!
But the girls wouldn’t let me do that. Naturally.
Anyway, I have to go now – the girls are angry with me, but if it were my birthday today – which it may or may not be – I would order a single shot of tequila and gather the girls and our friends around at the table. And then I would stand up and hold my shot-glass high in the air in tribute to all the readers of Paotie’s Green Couch and declare:
Be good .. or be good at it.
Paotie
Sphere: Related Content
Well happy may or it may not be your birthday!
Just use the good stuff…
You ain’t no Jehovah’s Witness, you’re an atheist.
You be good at it, dude, at celebrating whatever, your birthday, your girls, your life so far, or your circle of friends on the green couch!
Sorry, this ain’t TGIF yet, but I’ll raise a virtual martini in turn. Cheers!
This May or may not be true since March 19th may or may not be your birthday and horoscopes may or may not be factual and you’ll have to wait one year before you’ll know if it may or may not be accurate, since, you may or may not believe it, ergo, you may or may not indulge in it today!
By Georgia Nicols
For those who’s birthday may or may not fall on March 19th:
IF MARCH 19 IS YOUR BIRTHDAY: Actor Bruce Willis (1955) shares your birthday today. You definitely do your homework. You’re extremely thorough in your approach to things, plus you work hard. Because you intend to succeed, you chart your course with care. You are both childlike and seriously determined. Basically, you’re hard-nosed and hardworking. This year, you will undergo a major change, perhaps as significant as something around 1999.
March 19, 1999?! Holy mackerel, all those nine’s!!!
Happy celebrations, Paotie. Enjoy your BBQ’ed squirrel. Cheers!
Let’s sing!!!!!!!
Happy may or may not birthday to you.. happy may or may not birthday to you.. happy may or may not to dear Paotie, that’s YOU, happy may or may not birthday to you.
La la la
-SG
Birthdays are religous or have the root in the religion? I am ignorant in this one… I grew up the commercialized celebration of birthdays soooo…
Hey!
Did you enjoy your mystery birthday present from me?
You got yourself a cute pug puppy that licks all over your face!!!
Commenters, in case if you missed the previous Paotie’s blog….
here it is:
http://cache.valleywag.com/assets/resources/screenclean.swf
White Ghost!
Thank you for that cute pug! The link works perfectly – the pup immediately began licking my screen once I clicked the link.
Good stuffs!
To everybody else: thank you for the birthday that may or may not have been yesterday!
Paotie
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!!
HAPPY UN-BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!!
HAPPY UN-BIRTHDAY, DEAR POTATO HEAD!!!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!!!
HAPPY UN=BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!!!
Come on….make your wish!
NOT!
Hahaha!
Misha
Ugh, sorry I missed it. I haven’t been trolling around much lately. Hope your birthday was wonderful!!